Dear Daughter,
I know this is a touchy subject but it has to be brought up by someone, so here goes.
Sex is not a toy and it is not a weapon. It should only be experienced when you are emotionally ready and old enough to understand what consequences could bring. I know at some point you will want to do it just because it will defy your Dad and I but that is not a logical reason. The decision must be made when love, trust and monogomy is involved. There is no taking it back something you have done no matter how bad you feel about it. So make sure it is the right decision for you and no one else. You are the only one who can say that you are "ready."
Do not let a guy pressure you into it either, if he tries to pressure you then it is not love and he does not deserve you. He is only doing it so that he can get sex. Real love asks for nothing in return. I am not saying that love doesn't take work but sex is not the answer to a problem in a relationship.
Do not sleep with more than one person, that brings on a whole other set of problems and risks. Sexually transmitted disease has a higher probability when you have more than one partner. That is not a gift that can be returned so please be aware and careful of this. If it makes you feel safer then ask for an STD test. If they get pissed off because of this request then you really don't want to touch that.
I am not trying to force my beliefs on you but I don't want the rest of your life affected by a decision you made too early and too young! It is a very important step in your life and it must be made for the right reasons. Not because you may lose someone if you don't or not because everyone else is doing it.
Just be sure you really know someone and you feel that they are the right one to share it with.
Just my advice.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
Love
Dear Daughter,
Love is one of the most powerful emotions there are. It can be passionate. It can be deceiving. It can be false and most importantly it can be unconditional.
When you find someone who look past your faults and not run screaming, hold on to them. When you find someone who makes you laugh uncontrollably, your almost there. When you find someone who sweeps you off your feet and takes your breath away then your home. It is amazing feeling to find the one person on this Earth who "gets" you in every way you thought possible. It doesn't happen often and I'm not saying that it only happens once but you have to have your heart open to it.
Your heart may get broken and it will hurt for a while but just remember that it is not permenant, it is a learning experience that will shape the person you become. Never be mad at someone who breaks it off, they have just come to the realization that you are not their "forever" and that is o.k. Look at it this way, if you are not their match then at least you will have made another friend who has made your life richer by being in it, even if it was just for a little while.
I want you to promise that if you feel like you are going nowhere with someone then you will let them go, do not waste your time or theirs because you are both on paths to find happiness with someone that can last a lifetime. There is no need to drag things out if there is no fire in your hearts.
I have only REALLY loved twice in my life, first to my first boyfriend whom I was with for six years, all throught high school and two years beyond. He was probably the one I felt at "home" with. We went through alot together and I think I will always love him. We still keep in touch even 10 years later because there is a bond there that will never disappear.
The second is with my husband now who swept me off my feet while I was working one day. He has kept my life interesting to say the least. He loves me for who I am and pushes me to be better and do things that may make me uncomfortable. He makes me laugh. He drives me insane but I believe if he didn't then there would be something wrong.
My point is, love can come from any direction and if it is true and passionate then it can be the stuff legends are made of.
Love is one of the most powerful emotions there are. It can be passionate. It can be deceiving. It can be false and most importantly it can be unconditional.
When you find someone who look past your faults and not run screaming, hold on to them. When you find someone who makes you laugh uncontrollably, your almost there. When you find someone who sweeps you off your feet and takes your breath away then your home. It is amazing feeling to find the one person on this Earth who "gets" you in every way you thought possible. It doesn't happen often and I'm not saying that it only happens once but you have to have your heart open to it.
Your heart may get broken and it will hurt for a while but just remember that it is not permenant, it is a learning experience that will shape the person you become. Never be mad at someone who breaks it off, they have just come to the realization that you are not their "forever" and that is o.k. Look at it this way, if you are not their match then at least you will have made another friend who has made your life richer by being in it, even if it was just for a little while.
I want you to promise that if you feel like you are going nowhere with someone then you will let them go, do not waste your time or theirs because you are both on paths to find happiness with someone that can last a lifetime. There is no need to drag things out if there is no fire in your hearts.
I have only REALLY loved twice in my life, first to my first boyfriend whom I was with for six years, all throught high school and two years beyond. He was probably the one I felt at "home" with. We went through alot together and I think I will always love him. We still keep in touch even 10 years later because there is a bond there that will never disappear.
The second is with my husband now who swept me off my feet while I was working one day. He has kept my life interesting to say the least. He loves me for who I am and pushes me to be better and do things that may make me uncomfortable. He makes me laugh. He drives me insane but I believe if he didn't then there would be something wrong.
My point is, love can come from any direction and if it is true and passionate then it can be the stuff legends are made of.
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